​Let’s keep it short, like my grocery bill. The only reason I have a shopping budget as low as I do is because I don’t like to do it regularly. I set myself up at 8 a.m. one day during the first week of the month and get everything for the month. I then come back home to review my current inventory, portion meats, freeze items, and write dinners for the month. If I know the veggies will go bad and I don’t need them crisp because they’ll be used in a soup or baked dish, I freeze them too. If it’s on sale, I’ll stock up; if it’s too pricey, I won’t get it that month. This has also led me to rotate meats, so each month features a different protein-heavy cost. Lastly, buy in bulk at restaurants: $85 for five tri-tips—trim the fat for tallow, cut steaks for two, and portion chunks or slices; $24 for 20 lbs of thighs—bones for stock, whole or cubed; $15–$20 for a 5–8 lb pork loin.

People waste food because they buy it without a plan to use it. Pinterest, Cook’s, or The New York Times are great resources for people who aren’t used to cooking. For beginners, bulk-bin spices are your best value. When you like a recipe, reuse it multiple times a month. Lately, the Dijon Cream Pork with Crispy Gnocchi has been our favorite.

We use the extra money for an experience savings account. I may go over or under depending on how many times I entertain, but I will never hear the words, “We have nothing to eat.”

​How many days of the week do you spend money? Every day, three times a week, or one day a week? U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics data found that the average American spends about $164.55 per day on essentials and discretionary items (housing, food, insurance, transportation, entertainment, etc.) when you break total annual spending into daily units. Did you know the average all-inclusive vacation with airfare sits between $150–$300 a day, and a cruise could be as little as $100 a day?

So what are we really spending all that money on? If we can be more intentional about our spending, we can start to use the excess to do more fun things or grow our wealth. But where does that money come from? First, we’ll start with a quick exercise. Tally how many days you spend money using your cards and bank accounts. This will not include your living expenses—housing, transportation, or utilities. Is it feasible to cut that spending, and by how much? What would be the financial impact?

Intentional spending is not about limiting what you spend, but understanding that it needs to serve a purpose. When presented with the option of gifts or experiences, I’d choose experiences with my family all day. This means that when I’m looking at gadgets and gizmos aplenty, they don’t mean as much to me. When you find the intentionality behind your spending—not to keep up with the Joneses—you find more joy in what you have. That’s truly living from a place of abundance instead of scarcity.

Why do we do this to ourselves? We have lofty goals for the beginning of the new year, and in order to set yourself up for success, you need to have mental stability and financial support. Many of us struggle to feel like our best selves when we are in survival mode. This could be from stress at work, weight gain, or family needs; these are compounded by financial stress. If we can control our spending habits and set our annual savings for the year, all of the things that seem out of control are relative. So today, we will talk about mindset.

Mindset is very easy to fix—JUST DO IT. If you want to achieve your goals, move forward with them. Don’t ask why you can’t do it; this wastes your energy and time and creates mental fatigue. Yes, you might not want to do it, but that’s not enough of a reason. The top tools I use to get it done are playlists, incentivizing, and discipline.

Playlists exude the energy that you are looking for to complete the task. Do you notice that when you work out there are usually no lyrics, just a steady rhythmic beat above your heart rate? When concentrating on creating, I use a Bach playlist; to organize, I’ll listen to Taylor Swift; and to cook, Frank Sinatra. Find a playlist, podcast, or show that allows you to revert to a trance-like state so that you can get out of your head and push forward.

Incentivizing helps when it comes to one-off goals. My dad used to get us Dairy Queen after we finished a day of yard work. With my brothers and sisters, to get them to clean their rooms, I would say, “You have to pick up five things and organize them, and then you can jump on the bed once,” or you could group them and jump on the bed multiple times. As an adult, I’ve seen people write their goals on champagne bottles, use the “buy now” option from their wish list, and finally treat themselves to something special.

Make your bed. This form of discipline is the least favorite but the best thing you can do. Consistency is the key to keeping long-term goals on track. This week, I want you to start with two times a week, then increase to three, until you get to every day, then go back down. Which days were harder for you? Now, with that information, can you create consistency with your task? This can be specific to a time of day or just checking a box. When the Apple Watch created the “close your rings” reminder for the hour, it wasn’t about doing it every hour; it was about doing more than what you had started with. Slowly, those reminders grew into a subconscious decision to move. Discipline is a growing skill, and it’s fed through consistency.

Changing your mindset will need to start by moving from a state of scarcity to a state of abundance. Look at what you have right now. Why do you need more? If you can’t afford what you have, you’ve probably been trying to live outside your means. Focus on small tasks to achieve your goals passively. Next week, we will start with the $1/day challenge.

Remember, you can do anything in this world, but you might not want to do the things that get you there—and that’s what will set you apart. Text me with questions or go to my Instagram @familyretire.